Cheryl Durongpisitkul - I Still Miss You Cheryl Durongpisitkul

I Still Miss You is a highly personal and cathartic exploration of trauma, loss and grief. Says Durongpisitkul: “The album draws on my lived experiences in a family shaken by my mother’s diagnosis of ovarian cancer and her battle with bipolar disorder. My mother suffered through these illnesses while raising four young children. We lost her to suicide when I was 18. Three years later, and a week into my first big overseas trip, I received a one-line email from my father saying: ‘Yes, I have Bowel Cancer.’ He died a week after my 24th birthday. It was on that overseas trip, 15 years ago, that I first had the idea to represent these experiences through music.”

On I Still Miss You, Durongpisitkul reminds the listener that “Grief can be an incredibly isolating experience. I want listeners to come away feeling connected.” Durongpisitkul’s experiences inform every aspect of the album—from form and harmonic structures to lyric and melody. Throughout the record one hears samples, spoken word, and lyrics all drawn from Durongpisitkul’s family videos and her personal diaries.

The collaboration with Brittelle came out of Durongpisitkul’s experience in the New Amsterdam Composer’s Lab. “Working with Brittelle and Hammond was really wonderful. They brought their own creative identities in service of the music,” says Durongpisitkul. Their production expands the 12-piece ensemble. It magnifies the tumultuous, emotional stages that Durongpisitkul explores with depth and clarity in her compositions.